Yeah, so Lies My Parents Told Me is totally a series I’m doing now.

College isn’t for girls is heavily paraphrased – summarizing a decade of reasoning to why they wouldn’t allow me to go to college after high school (but I could apply? for what? humor?)

They took the opinion that since women are just going to be wives and mothers there’s no need for higher education (don’t try to logic it) – they’re just going to grow up to homeschool their kids (with no more than a barely-highschool education, because that’s totally wise) so the only skills they need are skills in bill paying, cooking, cleaning, and childcare.

Which is what my parents ultimately tried to dedicate my life to – and did, successfully, for a decade – raising their kids and learning all the skills I’d need to be the perfect “helpmeet” for my future husband who obviously would want a house overrun with children taught by someone who’s education was curtailed because lady parts deemed some subjects unnecessary. This whole bit basically reminds me of that part in little women when Amy’s teacher said it’s as useless to educate a girl as it is to educate a female cat <paraphrase. 

My parents loved planning out my life. Before they hopped on the no college bandwagon, they were going to send me to a votech school where I would major(?) in cosmetology and culinary arts. Nevermind that I didn’t have an interest in either, especially culinary arts, as I already cooked most of the meals by the time I hit puberty. When “god” showed them how unbiblical it was for women to pursue higher education (oh, there could be a whole other series on theology, dudes), they nixed the votech idea and jumped straight to you’re gonna get married ASAP and HAVE ALL THE KIDS. Again, completely ignoring my opinion or thoughts on the matter.

Turns out, college isn’t evil, it just takes away daughters from being their parent’s slaves.